When Ryan and I could never make the time to talk about what to do with him, we realized that we didn't want to talk about it and that in itself was a decison. So we went with that, and lived with Ollie's little 'problem'.
And for awhile he got better again, and then not so much, and then better again. He seemed to go through cycles -- we'd have good months and bad months. And since Ryan and I weren't willing to discuss the elephant in the room, we lived with it.
Until about a month ago, when Ollie started to repeatedly beat the crap out of our other cat, Chloe for no particular reason other than she'd walk into the room he was in.
We didn't even notice it was happening at first because ever since we got Chloe (7 years ago) from time to time the two of them would beat the crap out of each other. Something brothers and sisters have to do every now and then.
But then it started happening every day. Then twice a day. Then three times a day. It was becoming unbearable.
And that's when I realized that every fight was now in the master bedroom. And every fight was now started because Ollie walked into the bedroom. This got me thinking about the last week or so and I realized that Chloe hadn't come for dinner in a few days. And I had found 'business' in a corner of the bedroom, but had assume it was Ollie's doing.
But no. Chloe was now too terrified to roam the house -- for fear of being beaten up -- and had set up a safe haven for herself in the master bedroom. And she wasn't leaving for any reason. Not to eat, not to pee, not for anything.
I promptly brought her food and water into the room, put a litter box in the closet (yuk, but better than her doing what she needed to do on the floor) and called the vet with a plea for help.
Our vet is a wonderful person, who is very understanding. First thing first, she told us to separate Ollie from Chloe. So he now lives in the spare room and she's free to roam the house. Except, she's still too scared to emerge from the bedroom for more than a few minutes at a time.
Our vet offered to do a few exploratory tests on Ollie to see if there's anything going on that's causing his aggression. We agreed, but I was honest with her, and with myself, and told her we don't know how much more we want to do.
I love my cat -- he has been my companion for many years -- but I think it might just be time to put him down. (There, I said it.)
We can't keep living like this.